P.J. O’Rourke Verbatim – Climate Change

Ready To Tell All Those Bees They Can't Have As Much Honey As You?

Verbatim text of Part II, Chapter 5, “Climate Change”, from P.J. O’Rourke’s, “Don’t Vote, It Just Encourages the Bastards”.


There’s not a g-ddamn thing you can do about it.  Maybe climate change is a threat, and maybe climate change has been tarted up by climatologists trolling for research grant cash.  It doesn’t matter.  There are 1.3 billion people in China, and they all want a Buick.  Actually, if you go more than a mile or two outside China’s big cities, the wants are more basic.  People want a hot plate and a piece of methane-emitting cow to cook on it.  They want a carbon-belching moped, and some CO2-disgorging heat in their houses in the winter.  And air-conditioning wouldn’t be considered an imposition, if you’ve ever been to China in the summer.
Now, I want you to dress yourself in sturdy clothing and arm yourself however you like—a stiff shot of gin would be my recommendation—and I want you to go tell 1.3 billion Chinese they can never have a Buick.
Then, assuming the Sierra Club helicopter has rescued you in time, I want you to go tell a billion people in India the same thing.

 
2014-03-12 fixed para alignment (had been centered inadvertently)

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