Science, or Art?: An Application of Creative Truthiness In the Workplace

I wrote some poems.
Some think they’re smart.
Some think they’re dumb.
I’ll call them Art.

 

campbellsthisisart-JoeyAllgood-RealWeirdArt

Creative Truthiness In a Can

(This Real Art is by Joey Allgood, at RealWeirdArt©)


 
Applied Linguistics

Babe sits at her desk all day,
Seems to dream the day away.
But if to that she did admit,
Employer and Babe would soon be split.

(It isn’t that she doesn’t try;
It’s just that thinking makes her cry.)

But Babe is wise in one small way:
She knows daydreaming doesn’t pay,
So rather than her habits change,
The syntax she has rearranged:
 

Syntax Definition

“The arrangement of words…to create well-formed sentences.”


 
Management, always impressed
By “looked at” stated     reassessed,
Or “Now” said as     This point in time,
Has chosen to ignore her crime,

Has left her to her own devices,
While other peoples pays the prices.

“This isn’t laziness” says she,
“A better word is:
 
 
‘Entropy’.”
 
 

Entropy Definition

“Lack of order or predictabililty; gradual decline into disorder.”


 
***
 
The actions and work habits of the project members in these adjoining offices are not at all fishy. Daily, they industriously visit each others’ project areas to chat, until, exhausted from their efforts, they settle slowly to the sandy bottom floor.
 
Fishy Gas Distribution-Entropy Gif

Poetry in Ocean 🙂


 
“K” is Karla Kraken, their single (1) efficient manager, who has earned 5 out of 5 Productivity Stars. Whoo-Hoo! Way to go, Karla!!
 
***
 
One Baad Dog
 
OR
 
A Single Occurrence of
A Deviant Canine or
Canine-Comparable
Mammal

It is sad, I suppose,
When a word dons new clothes;
Because how does we knows,
If it comes or it goes?

Like when NASA torqued “normal”,
Into something more formal,
And came up with “nominal”!
Truly abominal.

But for one who loves punning,
And thrills to word-funning,
Tricky and slippery words are trés cunning.

When a bad can mean good,
When a dog can mean man,
“Bad dog” can mean one dog
Less chastised, it can.
 
 
NERDENDUM

The laziness/entropy word switch is actually more an issue of semantics than syntax,
 

Semantics Definition

The meaning of a word, PHRASE, sentence, or text.


 
but I left it as it was written originally because of the more-words-are-better-isms used in business.
 
The first poem was written decades back, when I was a first-year programmer. The second was written as a comment on this WordPress post.

 

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48 Comments

  1. Funny!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  2. After years of designing and building complex systems, management promoted me to System Architect to get me out of their hair. I loved it. I read, I wrote, I blogged and if anyone asked me something, I just said, “Hmmmm, that’s interesting, let me think about it.”

    Liked by 2 people

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    • Gack! None of MY jobs designing systems ever provided enough leisure for breathing! But besides sexism–women are rarely permitted those lovely sit-on-your-fanny part of the day fanning yourself positions–it was probably as much my compulsive nature, though. And partly ’cause I loved solving puzzles so much.

      Me, who now can’t figure out why Apple’s vanilla mail program on the Iphone winds up with a SLIGHTLY higher inbox count than the gmail account it’s theoretically synched with (sans Icloud use). What IS it that triggers the occasional send that turns up its postal proboscis at gmail, but happily shoots down the chute into Apple’s mail barrel? The Apple dudes don’t know. Were I younger, I WOULD. Arghh.

      Thanks for stopping by, Almost : )

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      • Hey, after thirty years of sixty hour weeks, all my dues and sins are paid for. Before I retired, they planted hay in my cube so I could have something to munch on as I lounged in the shade of the tree. 🙂

        What’s a gmail? What’s an apple for that matter? My kids had to find me an app with a dial so I could use my smart phone [snarf]

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        • Sixty hour weeks? Slacker. When i met my ex, I had just put in a 72 hour week, AND I was doing a volunteer shift on a rape and battering hotline from the office simultaneously while debugging other people’s lousy code. I earned my Master’s while still working, spawning my first and giving birth to my second–and they’re Irish twins. Top that one 😉 But now, MY once-munch-bucket, which I also put aside oh-so-wisely, grasshopper style while I watched the ants around me live it up, is sorely-deplected, going to pay medical costs PRE-retirement. While I watch the ants around me live it up. (barf!)

          –Bitter Babe (Oh, wait–is that taken?)

          Late for a very important date–Have a fun slacker day, and stay warm, Almost!

          Liked by 1 person

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  3. My your pomes are mighty clever
    Leaves me wondering if I should ever
    Put pen to paper on my computer(!?)
    Would poetry boffs shout “Let’s recruit ‘er?”

    My verses are simple as is my mind
    And oh how heavenly when I manage to find
    Some words that go together beeoootifully
    Then I publish on wordpress for all to see!

    Liked by 1 person

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  4. With this line your poem a limerick became!!

    Liked by 2 people

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  5. You mean that highest form of the poetic arts? I swoon…

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  6. I don’t know what to say as it’s all been said
    More poems we need like a hole in the head
    But it’s fun I say to rhyme away
    I’ll sing your phrases to ease the work day 🙂

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    • Yeah, I know, everyone’s sick of my simple verse,
      Excepting me—I’m my own universe,
      Instead of improving my stats, I’m making them verse,
      Not offering new material, but the reverse.

      And golly, that stunk.
      But what the hey–I’ve been really busy, ya’ know?

      Like

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  7. Oh Babe the words they didn’t stink
    Rhymes are good they make you think
    They are contagious and I’ve seen things growing
    The seeds were planted and now they’re showing
    All I meant was that it seems to be catching
    It’s the plot that thickens while the gremlins are hatching
    So we do need more rhymes it was my way of saying
    I’m addicted to the cause and I’m a junkie for playing 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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    • But it’s no fun to play with you,
      You’re too d#mn good; you make me blue.
      Your rhymes come quick and slick and fine,
      Word meaning, rhyme scheme, all in line.

      Liked by 2 people

      Reply
    • What we ought to do is step it up a notch. This weekend, mayhaps I’ll dig out my Riverside Shakespeare, or Chaucer. Then, we can switch our iambs and pentameters, and go for trickier parameters!

      Liked by 2 people

      Reply
  8. Nothing in my bag of tricks has ever allowed me to write an (in)decent doggerel, so I’ll stay out of this one. Very Nash-esque poetry, Ogden Babe.

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    • You said over at your place how much you love Nash, Barbara.

      I remember reading a whole string of his animal poems as a little girl and being delighted. They were doubly-fun: Their twisty use of language and their jokes about the animals. Have you seen the Saint-Saens "Carnival of the Animals" children's video with the twins playing piano? I bought it for my boys and we used to watch it all the time. Oh, hang on–Half a mo'…
      💡
      Yup–HERE it is!
      😀
      Please watch at least two or three minutes, and see what you think. (I had to get past Burghoff’s thin voice quality, myself.)

      Like

      Reply
  9. Thank you my lovely for the compliment
    But it’s you and yours that challenge regiment
    Sounds like a plan for carousing but it is a bit too soon
    More time I will have after the next full moon
    I’ve been flogged at work until my brain hurts badly
    And there’s more to come for the next while sadly
    Let’s make it a date to go all pedantic
    When life allows a break for the hopelessly frantic
    March 1st is the deadline for tax shelters you see
    So I’ll have to pend the play with the iambic with thee

    And now I’m late for work, but it felt great to shirk.
    But that’s ok because my boss is a jerk 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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  10. Madam (if I may say so without appearing impertinent) you have style 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  11. After reading yours and Unreqwrited’s Battle of the Bards, my brain hurts. So this is all you get:
    I once worked turning Business Analyst waffle into End User simple instruction where the rule of thumb was why use three words when one will suffice. The BAs would always get shitty that we’d decimated their complex wording.

    Liked by 1 person

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  12. You can hardly call it a battle. Stephanie never fails to wipe me out in the first round. She wiped the mat with me in the last, if you noticed–and she produced that two-notches-above-doggerel bit in MOMENTS.

    MY brain hurts when I think about YOUR multi-tasking multi-competencies. But you and I are of a pain-free mind re: simple language. One version of my resume used to claim competency at translating technobabble and geekspeak into plain English.

    (So, Babe, what the heck happened when you turned to blogging, run-on post-and-comment queen!?)

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  13. Oh Babe, surely you are not serious about wiping you out. I couldn’t hold a candle to you. My rhymes are simple and slanted and at best might belong in childrens’ categories (well the clean stuff lol). But I do find it fun and addicting. I’ve been researching it to find the basis of my addiction. Bi-polar/manic depression seems to be a common theme but I am not, as far as I know, in that spectrum. But I might be gasp Aspiedextrous 😉

    Liked by 1 person

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  14. Thank you so much for showcasing my work on your funny, witty, wonderful blog (I don’t read the icky stuff)!

    😀

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    • You’re welcome, Joey. Thanks for the compliment! Glad you didn’t make it over ’til now: The post was up for a while before I noticed it was missing a word in the opening lines and made no sense whatsoever.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
    • Joey, I was re-reading tonight and realized I neglected to thank you back for having such wonderful, witty art from which I was able to dip into and borrow. Thank you.
      (Biting my tongue really hard so that I don’t add anything about you that rhymes with the marks being left in it by my teeth. What are those long marks called? You know: When something sharp slices something?)
      😈

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  15. Had a wonderful time reading all of this, just now. I have an ongoing battle with my pals in the academic citadel of poetry (I am an outcast because I still write in sentences) about “light verse”, —down their noses at which they peer. In my book, people like Nash and Lear, Ira Gershwin, Dorothy Parker, Gilbert and Sullivan, etc. are genii. Fun and sheer delight in language….what’s not to love?

    Liked by 1 person

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  16. Thank you. How could I possibly not agree? 🙂

    Particularly being a dateless specs-wearer who thinks of Dorothy daily.

    Gasp! That’s IT! I shall remove the frames, let down my amber locks, and my Prince will appear! But–without my glasses on, how will I spot him?

    Like

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