Sex In the Classroom

Three boys are dry-humping the class furniture.
Three Humping Dogs Memory Sticks

Ever-So-Classy Real-Action Humping Dog Memory Sticks

We should be used to it by now.  It happens throughout the day, every day, often accompanied by grunts and moans.   Just as with dogs, they will use any available surface:  the cupboard doors, the corners of desks, the backs of chairs.
The Office has expressed only token dismay at this behavior, and has suggested that I find more stimulating class activities to distract the boys from their non-academic pursuits.
I am a first year teacher in a Special Ed classroom. I have been assigned no mentor. No supervisor has yet visited my classroom, or me.
Nothing I’ve tried within my four storage-room walls has worked. (We have been illegally stuck in a half-size storage room rather than a classroom.)
I request a conference with each of the children’s parents, with an administrator present.  I am told by The Office that this can instead be addressed at the annual Parent-Teacher conference.
I request that the offending children be removed to a class for children with emotional problems.  The Office refuses, with this reasoning:  “Those classes are really terrible places, with severely disturbed children.  Do you really think that these boys will benefit from being placed with kids like that?”
These boys ARE kids like that!
I honestly do not think they would be any worse off, and they might get the help they need.  What I am certain of is that if they are allowed to continue, the rest of my students won’t stand a chance of getting the help they need.
If I were the school administrator confronted with such a situation, I would, in the following sequence:
1)  Discuss the matter with each of the children together and individually, to see if this is simply a case of jacking the new teacher around;
2)  Arrange for another adult to drop in on the class to mentor, and help control the activities;
3)  If the acts continued, refer the families to social services and send the children to the school psychologist.
If I were a parent of another child seated in a room like this, with a non-responsive school administration like this, I would threaten a lawsuit for exposing my child to sexual behavior and risk of sexual assault.
If I were other than a first-year teacher, having to put up with this and watch my other students sit through it,  I would film the behavior and then plant that lawsuit idea myself.
Wet Floor-Piso Mojado Sign

Don’t Take It Lying Down

If your own administration is shirking their responsibilities and leaving you and your young charges with a student who is a risk to them or you:
Plant a seed and watch it grow:
Initiate a carefully-worded discussion with the (sadly) total of one or possibly two parents who are actively involved in seeing their special ed children succeed. Subtly let the parent(s) know what’s going on. Invite/encourage her/him/them to drop in often and observe.
Administrators don’t have to pay attention to discontented teachers. But if discontented parents make enough noise, that can make them nervous.
(Don’t forget to first keep a log and take video to document the situation and what steps you’ve already tried, and what steps the administration has not.)

1st Teaching Post: Shocked By a Rock
Next Teaching Post: Browbeating Innocent Ponies


Leave a comment


  1. OK, have you tried talking to other teachers in your position to see what is happening with them? These types of sparation problems are treated very differently in each school system.


    • Jeez, Paul, I’d thought no one would see this. It’s a really old post that was on my sub-bloggit site. I’ve decided to can that sub-bloggit and re-migrate those posts over here. I posted it as Private, then updated its date to the original post date (3 years ago), then re-posted as Public–and you found it!

      I am no longer a teacher. Teaching contributed to the development of my second autoimmune disorder. Teachers have a higher rate of developing these–unknown reasons. Main theories: Stress, or constant exposure to challenges to the immune system from children’s illnesses. Or both.

      I am not sure why you refer to the boys’ behavior as a separation problem. One went on to attempt to rape a cousin that same year.


      • Sorry OB. I have gotten about 8 e-mail notifications of your posts – they all seem t be in a series like this one.


        • No, I’M sorry. I had no idea that when I ported these back over, it would cause a bombardment into folks’ emailboxes. I turned off tweeting, FB, Google+, and LinkedIn notifications, but forgot about Followers who do it via email.

          SO sorry!


  2. georgiakevin

     /  2015/01/25

    Man can I ever relate to your post. I am a special ed teacher who has taught in 4 districts in 3 states for the last 17 years. I have only had proper funding and no support in my 2 school districts in WA. Currently I teach in the 2nd poorest county in GA. I have no curriculum and no funding. In the last 6 years students have broken 2 of my teeth and 2 of my ribs. Last year a student severely bruised my elbow and then a month later destroyed $5,000 worth of classroom furniture and computers. I finally was given a new computer in November. More and more is expected from special educators while we get less support and less help.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Your job made me ill–literally. I (almost) feel your pain. I am so sorry. I believe all classrooms should be webcast. The public–and world–should see what teachers do on a daily basis. Things would change overnight.

      Liked by 2 people

  3. Oh wow, I SO PLEASED you aren’t it this environment anymore. I came herw from an email – the post about Rey, and just followed back, without noticing dates. I just spotted your response to Paul. Okay, I’ll go find the home page – since I haven’t been here awhile. I kept thinking WHEN did she start this job, I don’t remember this! Relieved, what an arsehole way to treat kids who need a proper solution.

    Liked by 1 person

  1. A Little Boy’s Too-Big Confession | The Last Half

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